Jason and I love Southern Utah, and especially Cedar City! We were excited that we got to plan a trip there this summer. Even the simplest trips become a big deal when your 13 weeks pregnant and still battling a little morning sickness, but we were determined to do it and have some fun! We were planning on staying in Cedar City for the first 6 days and then head to Kanab for my 10 year High School Reunion for the Fourth of July weekend, but unfortuantely it didn't turn out that way. We spent about 4 1/2 days in Cedar City, trying to fit in as much as we could with all the friends and family that we have to see while we are there, but then things went sour. We got in a pretty big blow-out fight with Jason's parents and had to leave their house (it was pretty bad, and not something I care to rehash). I was quite upset and stressed out about it, but what do you do? We drove to Hurricane at midnight to find a place to stay for the night. After we got the kids in the motel and all settled into bed, I started to get myself ready for bed and went to the bathroom and realized I was bleeding. Since I was 13 weeks pregnant, this was a very scary thing! We went to the urgent care and they told us their wasn't really anything they could do if it was a miscarriage and that I would just need to let it happen and that if it wasn't a miscarriage, then I needed to go home and rest and stay unstressed for a while. They couldn't even try to hear the baby's heartbeat or give me an ultrasound unless I wanted to go to the ER, so we didn't know what to do or what was going on. We decided to just drive back home to Vernal and cut the vacation short since either way I needed to go home and rest and find out what was happening. When we got back to Vernal, we called my doctor to get an appointment and since it was the 4th of July weekend, they were closed for a long weekend (4 days, fri.-mon.) and said I would need to go into the ER, so since I didn't seem to be in any pain and still not knowing what was happening, I didn't know if a $1,000 co-pay to go into the ER was worth it, so we waited it out. I tried to research some information about it on-line, but that was just confusing since there is so much conflicting advice. There are a lot of people that bleed during pregnancy and end up just fine, and I wasn't in pain, so I was starting to regain hope that maybe everything was okay. After the long weekend, I was thinking I was going to be okay and I called my doctor's office on Tuesday, right when they had re-opened, but they told me that since I wasn't in pain and bleeding too badly, that it wasn't an emergency and they were so busy because of being closed for the holiday that they couldn't see me until the next day (Wednesday). Well, Tuesday night I started bleeding A LOT and weird stuff, so I knew something was wrong, so after all that, I went into the ER that night and they did an ultrasound. The baby was in there, but there was no heartbeat. They kept trying and trying to get a heartbeat, but there just wasn't one. It was the hardest thing to see. I've never cried so hard in my life! It was a rough time. My body didn't seem to want to start the miscarriage process on it's own, so we had to schedule a D&C a few days later. It wasn't a fun thing to go through, but I was glad to just get it over with instead of having it drag out and be miserable for a few weeks.
So, it wasn't the greatest summer after all, but we just have to be thankful for the kids we do have and slowly get over all of this. I've heard of so many people that have had miscarriages, but I had no idea it would be this hard, especially at 13 weeks. I think each day that goes by in your pregnancy you become more and more attached and excited about another sweet person coming into your lives.
Anyways, this was not the funnest post to write about, and I've been putting it off for a long time, but I tried to keep it short and I wanted to at least write about it so that we can remember the things we've been through in life.
On a happier note, here are some pictures from the fun we did have in Southern Utah!!!
Kaysen, Owen, McKade, Jaylee and Bretten wading their feet in the river.
I met up with my friend Jennifer at the park for some lunch. We let our kids play in the river while we visited! It was a lot of fun to see her and her new little baby!
Bretten, Jaylee, and Kaysen playing in the river at The Canyon Park
Bretten and Jaylee with an amazing view!
Our whole family, plus a bun in the oven, at Cedar Breaks overlook...I have to say this in not a very good family picture or very flattering of any of us, but it had all of us in it, so we'll deal with it!
Bretten and Jaylee couldn't get enough of this place. It was pretty amazing.
Jaylee and Bretten doing a little bit of hiking!
Me (13 weeks pregnant) with my 4 awesome kids! Don't mind our crazy hair. We had been playing in the water earlier!
Jaylee playing at Discovery Park in Cedar City! This town has the best parks!!!
Bretten climbing around at Discovery Park!
Hailey and Rylan hanging out in the shade. It was a pretty hot day!
I was lucky that my sister Sunny drove down to Cedar City so that we could go to lunch with Andy and then take our kids to the park. It was a lot of fun!
Jaylee holding her little cousin Hailey! She wants a baby sister sooo bad!
Bretten and Jaylee begged for a picture in this tree! So here you go! haha
Rylan and Daddy at the street fair in Cedar City!
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